Leave it to Leslie Jones and menopause to make “The View” a more entertaining show.
The “Saturday Night Live” veteran was midway through a chat Tuesday with Whoopi Goldberg, Joy Behar and the rest of the “View” crew when she suddenly began sweating, visibly. She managed by drying her face with a small navy blue towel that magically appeared under the table.
“You’re… you’re sexy,” Behar stuttered, interrupting a conversation in which she had opined that comics tell the truth and undermine propaganda.
“I'm always hot, honey,” Jones replied, continuing his drying adventure before explaining, perhaps unnecessarily, “I'm having that menopause. That pause, that pause.”
The interpreter continued. “I'm in it,” he said. “I'm on 'pause'. The heat I give off can illuminate a small city in Guadalajara.”
Forget that Guadalajara itself is a city, and not a small one. Jones' deadpan demeanor at the time led Sunny Hostin to begin fanning her with a large card. Behar joined with her own card.
“Let's talk about your latest comedy show because it's fun and it's called 'Leslie Jones: Life Part 2,'” Hostin said, trying to get the segment back on track.
She didn't quite make it.
“I'm spraying!” Jones said as he once again dried his wet face with the magic towel.
The show played a clip from his special where he talked about everyone needing to go to therapy, after which Hostin steered the conversation on “The View” toward dating.
Goldberg then stole the show, having left her seat to take over her guest's dabbing duties. “I could die now,” Jones said, spreading his hands palms up and looking up at the sky with a peaceful smile as he enjoyed Whoopi's careful attention. “This is kinda… it's a dream. It's a dream come true.”
At that point, Hostin seemed to stop talking about boys with Jones and began once again fanning her with the card.
“Whoopi Goldberg wiping my sweat,” Jones declared, relaxing into the experience.
“Yes, it's a beautiful moment,” Behar growled.
Oh, but wait. Hostin couldn't refuse. Or maybe he wouldn't deny whatever the producer was shouting into his earpiece.
“You talk a lot about the men you've met… so tell us, how's the pool?” he asked, not realizing that the audience was much more interested in Whoopi now fanning Jones by waving the magic towel. “Have you found any man,” Hostin wondered, “who would do that for you?” Do you admire yourself? Dry your sweat?
“Unfortunately, no,” Jones responded. “Listen, I'm 58 now, so I'm over the nonsense.”
“At 58, you're also postmenopausal,” Dr. Behar chimed in, revealing herself to be an expert in female endocrinology. “It should be over by now.”
Jones snapped out of his reverie and looked at Behar as if she were a bag of dog poop burning on his front door. But she didn't stomp on the bag to put it out. “It's different for everyone,” Alyssa Farah Griffin chimed in happily.
“Do we have beef?” Jones asked Behar, looking at her with that stony look that only Leslie Jones can offer.
“Not that I know of?” Behar said. “You know what, we respectfully disagree.”
It's good to know that Behar believes that Jones is not capable of experiencing the symptoms of menopause even though Jones experiences them right in front of her face.
Meanwhile, Whoopi escalated the erasure, offering words of comfort to Jones as Behar continued to babble in her own defense.
“You're coming at me,” Jones told Behar.
“Let me see your face,” Whoopi said.
“Thank you, honey,” Jones said to his personal sweat swab.
And the conversation returned to the dating scene, which Jones correctly told Hostin is “not shady. It's devilish.” As she spoke, Whoopi folded the magic towel, placed it in a magical resting place, and stepped back, blowing on Jones as she took slow steps toward her abandoned chair.
“Just blow on me, baby,” Jones said, and Whoopi stepped back and obeyed. Behar, who looked uncomfortable, asked someone to grab a hand towel.
“It's very sad,” Jones said, “that my entire ad is going to focus on me sweating.”
After a commercial break, Behar had a small electric fan in her hand and quickly pointed it at Jones. “This one will take care of all your problems.”
“Thank you, honey. I'm fine,” Jones said. “Now I'm freezing.”
No girl. When it came to Joy Behar at the time, you were just cold.
