On the shelf
'Wild West Village'
By Lola Kirke
Simon & Schuster: 272 pages, $ 29
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When Lola Kirke was a young teenager, her “Manny” was a fallen rock musician with limit problems, while a family star friend from the family call The actor -Musician remembers in her trial collection, “Wild West Village”. Then he spent time visiting a sister in rehabilitation and the day he knew he had half a brother of one of his father's affairs.
Then, while Kirke grew up with wealth and privilege (she is the daughter of the drummer of bad company Simon Kirke), and glamorous older brothers (Domino signed with a recording agreement in his adolescence while Jemim In his expensive reddish stone in New York and his private school was not always easy. She writes about a chaotic family life in a house full of alcohol and drugs (Jemima has openly talked about time in rehabilitation).
Even when Kirke found success on his own, for his prominent role in “Mozart in the Jungle”, among other projects, he was fighting with his sense of who he was, drinking, smoking and sabotaging himself on the road. Now 34 years old, living in Nashville and with a flourishing country music career and a stable relationship, Kirke has resorted to self -reflection, and although the book is subtitled “it is not a memory (unless an Oscar wins, he dies tragically or tragically Write down a country #1) “, is a lot of memory.
Kirke spoke recently with the Times about his unusual education and writing in this regard. This interview has been edited by length and clarity.
Do you now think how a country singer or as someone who sings and acts and now writes?
I consider myself a person who sings and acts and now writes. I don't think it's wise, at least for me, identify as anything else than a person. Life is too precarious, and if you are lucky to try to make art like your career, it is so volatile that I feel that you first have to put yourself in your personality.
Why did you call this, not a memory?
I describe myself as fame, not famous. When writing a memory at my age, I feel horcated in a strange line: it is not just a literary memory, but I am not completely in the celebrity lane, although much of the world in which I grew up was about being someone . The subtitle is saying that I know that I have not done the things you should do to write a celebrity memory and make fun of that idea.
You write about your boyfriend, whom you call the cowboy, saying that you need to be enough “someone” just for yourself. Have you reached that level of acceptance?
He has taken a lot of work, but in reality I feel very punished in that way now. I am very grateful because it is very exhausting to constantly try to be someone for other people. And that is much of what my book is about.
I know that my parents love me the best I can and very, very deeply, and that I got a lot of those relationships, but I did not always feel that love. And so my work, be it performance, music or writing, I am saying: “I love you” and want someone to say: “I love you too.” Now I can see, I am also loved, and I don't need to pursue something that is already there. And that is a relief.
Did you need to find yourself to write the book, or write it helped to overcome your insecurities about your identity?
Writing has helped me discover and articulate who I am in a way I never met. Much of excellent writing when I read it is naming the unnameable. When someone can express the things they have felt, be it music, prose or poetry or simply an advertising slogan, it is incredible. When I started writing about my life, I really understood it much better.
I made the mistake of going to Goodree and the first review, of a woman named Jennifer de Boston, said essentially: “She stinks and is not famous enough to write a memory.”
Then I would receive three good reviews, so I would continue to return, but the next one would be “I hate his writing, and who is the @#$ @ Do you think it is?” So I'm getting used to being loved, and I am grateful to this book and my writing for helping me to do that.
Are you naturally fun or did you think consciously that I need to keep this entertaining so that he does not feel heavier than my life was really?
I aspired to be fun all my life, but it is recently that people have begun to tell me that I am fun. When reading my writing, I could see how much positive humor uses and avoiding, so I learned a lot when editing my own work.
But also, when I read my own work during the edition, I have noticed this different voice that I have as a writer. People have said: “Reading your book is talking to you,” but do you remember Dame Edna? I feel that Dana wrote my book, a great delusional lady who is so fun. I don't know who that person is, but I guess I am. I think that, by virtue of the way I grew up, my perspective will seem fun in a myriad of ways for other people, whether fun or simply, “oh, it is a bit off.”
I have this type of delusional charm, but that can be a manipulative tactic to survive. I always wanted people to like it and I didn't feel sure in the world for much of my life, so I had to be very lovely to feel safe. And now I let that go a little, and thank God, because it is exhausting. [Switching to a dry, joking tone] It is exhausting to be so charming.
You did not discover that you had half brother until late adolescence; He was born with severe brain damage and died at age 19; You spent a few years visiting him even though your father never did. How did that affect you?
I think he softened and opened me. As a person who is probably more in the precipice of being a mother, has made me think about what it is to be a true mother. I think of unconditional love and learning what is that and learn to give it. I grew up in this world where being someone is what a place wins you in the world. At least, that was the feeling he had. With him I saw that it is worth loving, no matter who you are. So that will always be with me.
How worried was the book to family members show?
The rule I tried to implement, and mainly, was that it would only tell stories about other people who have already revealed themselves in one way or another. But when I shared it with my family, I definitely received comments from: “Oh, I have never told anyone.”
My sisters have been absolutely incredible about the book, which was very encouraging for me. He was more afraid of his reaction. His support feels like the fraternal relationship I write about not having so much throughout the book. So that was a true blessing.
My brother asked: “Why am I no more in the book?” But it has been very sweet about it: it is 12 years older than me and was almost out of the house. But it was not really good, so there is not enough drama with him.
Certainly there have been other people who have been really upset. But some who thought they could be upset have loved them. It is difficult to write about people who are alive and be written. [With mock petulance] I haven't become a character in someone's book … I'm waiting.