JD Vance is crowned heir apparent on the first day of the Republican National Convention

Donald Trump has a new partner.

Joe Biden was called old and senile.

Republican delegates — and those watching on television — received a lecture about high gas and food prices and a chance to watch a visibly bandaged Trump arrive to triumphantly claim the GOP nomination.

The Republican National Convention held its first day in the Cream City, America's most unfortunate metropolitan nickname (sorry, Milwaukee, you're better than that).

Columnists Anita Chabria and Mark Z. Barabak break it all down. Together, they look back at the first day and assess Trump’s choice of Ohio Sen. J.D. Vance as his running mate — a bold move that ends a decades-long scarcity of facial hair on a presidential ticket.

Chabria: So JD Vance, author of “Hillbilly Elegy” and a guy who at one point (like in 2016) compared Trump to Hitler, is now the crown prince of a Trump dynasty that is expected to form. What do you make of that, Mark?

Barrabac: You'd have to be a complete jerk not to respect and admire Vance's career, which, to use a phrase often heard on Monday, truly embodies the American dream.

The rise from an impoverished and dysfunctional childhood in the unfortunate region of Appalachia to Yale Law School and the US Senate is truly the stuff of political myth-making.

Less admirable is Vance’s elasticity and apparent total lack of deep, unwavering principles. In addition to the famous reference to “Hitler,” he used a whole glossary of words like “idiot” to describe Trump, called himself “a guy who would never support Trump” and said he “never liked him.”

Republican vice presidential nominee JD Vance greets delegates at the Republican National Convention on Monday in Milwaukee.

(Paul Sancya/Associated Press)

Well, forget about all that.

It is unlikely that Vance will bring much to the ticket in terms of broadening its political appeal. Rural and white working-class voters who can appreciate and see something of themselves in Vance will already vote for Trump. Twice, if they could.

Vance’s strongest attribute, it seems — aside from an endorsement from billionaire super-troll Elon Musk, who lobbied for his selection and is now promising to pour obscene amounts of money into a pro-Trump Super PAC — is his sycophancy.

At a 2022 campaign event, when Vance was running for Senate, Trump appeared and mocked him for “kissing my ass” in a desperate attempt to gain his support. Vance chuckled.

Of course, look where he is now. So maybe Vance will have the last laugh.

Why do you think Trump chose him?

Chabria: I agree with all that, but I see something darker in Vance, and something distinctly Californian, although not in a good way.

As you noted, he has ties in Silicon Valley (he worked there as a venture capitalist) not only to Musk but also to billionaire David Sacks, who has become a Trump fanatic to the point that he spoke at the convention on Monday night. And then there's Peter Thiel, who gave Vance $10 million for his Senate campaign and is a longtime Trump supporter.

These men have worldviews that seem to have little relevance to democracy and much weight to their own interests.

To me, Vance represents not only a potential Trump dynasty, but also a path to power for this philosophy that the rich should rule.

I think we're about to hear a lot about the benefits of cryptocurrencies, deregulation, and how leaving Ukraine is good foreign policy.

And yet, we still wonder if Biden is too old to protect democracy. What do you think about this?

Barrabac: Biden’s age was not a major issue on the evening’s programming, but when it did come up it was not the least bit subtle.

A video montage claimed the 81-year-old chief executive has trouble walking down stairs and getting dressed. A frozen image of a frozen-faced Biden, taken from his dismal debate performance, appeared on the giant screen in the convention hall like a geriatric gargoyle.

Sens. J.D. Vance (R-Ohio), right, and Tommy Tuberville (R-Ala.) were among Republican lawmakers who traveled to New York City in May to support former President Trump during his hush money trial. Trump named Vance as his 2024 running mate on Monday.

(Stefan Jeremiah/Associated Press)

In scathing remarks, Sacks called the president “asleep and senile” and a puppet manipulated by a deceitful White House staff, who has continually misled the country by concealing his precarious condition.

America needs someone strong, Sacks said mockingly, in case a crisis arises after 8 p.m. — the time Biden has suggested he needs to go to bed at night to preserve his stamina.

I know we've been discussing this over and over, Anita, but I think this just underscores why Democrats need to replace Biden at the top of the ticket as his path to reelection grows ever narrower.

Unlike the many false claims made Monday (such as the state of the economy under Trump versus current conditions), the attacks on Biden’s age are based on things he said or did, such as his faltering walk through that calamitous debate.

But enough of that. What else caught your attention on the first day?

Chabria: I have more thoughts on the convention, but the most interesting person I spoke to yesterday was my Pakistani taxi driver.

She's voting for Trump, but not because she likes him. She thinks Trump is racist, so anti-immigrant that members of her family fought to get citizenship the last time Trump was elected because they were afraid of being deported.

But the middle-aged, working-class immigrant is terrified by rising prices, especially for housing, and hopes Trump can bring inflation down.

The point is that the economy is playing an outsized role in this election and is far more important to the average voter than Biden's age.

Rep. Lou Correa (D-Santa Ana) argued that 80 is the new 60. I would say lower rents are the new 60 when it comes to Biden.

But back to the big tent, what struck me last night was the abundance of God and the speeches of grievance.

Christian nationalism—the idea that government and Christianity should have little separation from each other—takes center stage.

There was much talk about how God saved Trump from an assassin’s bullet. South Carolina Senator Tim Scott, describing the aftermath of Saturday’s shooting, used the Christian symbol of Jesus as a lion to describe the former president:

“An American lion stood up and roared,” Scott said. “Yes, it roared.”

What did you think of the message, Mark?

Barabbas: The edict of restraint that followed the attempted assassination of Trump worked to a certain extent. Two of the GOP’s most outspoken and spitting personalities (you know, the kind of personalities convention organizers had to watch out for) delivered relatively mild speeches.

Yes, Marjorie Taylor “Jewish Space Lasers” Greene joined the culture wars with an anti-trans rant, but most of her comments were pretty much in line with GOP orthodoxy on the border and plenty of invocations to God.

North Carolina gubernatorial candidate Mark Robinson spoke of his difficult childhood in a family overshadowed by domestic abuse and the effects of foreign trade agreements on American workers, avoiding his usual anti-LGBTQ and gun fetish rants.

Sen. Ron Johnson of Wisconsin apparently didn’t listen to the memo, making comments describing Democrats as a “clear and present” danger and then blaming the nameless, faceless person operating the teleprompter for loading the wrong speech.

To be fair, it’s hard to change your stance on such short notice, as South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem demonstrated (Note: no dogs or other animals were harmed in the making of her speech). She urged Republicans to “keep fighting, keep standing together!”

Which seems like a contradiction, doesn't it?

Chabria: This new mandate is certainly providing a push to appear softer, kinder and more inclusive. Of course, the Republican platform has not changed to reflect that and remains replete with policies aimed at curtailing civil rights and dismantling safety nets.

But I think we were both surprised by the inclusion of Teamsters President Sean O'Brien as a speaker. The Teamsters, and unions in general, support Democrats. O'Brien has been arguing for months that he doesn't care which party is in power, as long as his union has a seat at the table.

As you can imagine, this has sparked controversy among many members of their 1.3 million-member union and angered others in organized labor. Not to mention that Biden and Democrats voted to save Teamsters pensions in the American Rescue Plan, which no Republicans supported.

O'Brien delivered a pro-worker speech to a mostly confused audience, at one point shouting, “Never forget, American workers own this nation,” something I'm pretty sure Musk, Sacks, Thiel and Trump would disagree with.

What did you think of O'Brien?

Barabbas: I was also captivated by his appearance, no less than in a coveted prime time slot.

Not because it was the first time the head of that robust union had addressed a Republican convention, but because it was the message you referred to: a fierce and forceful attack on “corporate elites” and “economic terrorism” practiced by greedy corporations and directed against unions.

It is not, as you have pointed out, what is usually said about a Republican convention.

Never mind, as you also suggested, that Republican policies — fighting regulations, passing tax cuts that largely benefit the wealthy — actually benefit the very corporations and elites that O'Brien so harshly condemned.

If you were a casual viewer, you might have thought, “Hey, that guy (and by extension, Trump’s Republican Party) speaks for me.”

It was a cynical but brilliant political program.

We'll see what else the future holds.