When Ethan Wong took his Tinder match to Disneyland, it didn't end happily ever after.
Instead, there were some awkward silences, expensive snacks, and a tense fireworks display where a romantic moment seemed obligatory. “I didn't even put my arm around her, I didn't do anything,” said Wong, who can laugh about it now. “So instead of going [for] Boba or whatever afterwards, she said, 'Yeah, now you can take me back to my car.'”
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Wong and his date, both annual passholders at the time, were among the Southern California locals who headed to Disneyland for a first meeting in hopes of having a magical time. In Disney movies, first dates consist of magic carpet rides and large ballrooms. But the romantic glow doesn't always translate to the theme park on a first date.
While Disneyland can test the compatibility (and stamina) of two people, it can also be overwhelming for two strangers. The theme park is a great fifth date, but the first can be a challenge.
First dates are pretty stressful. Then add crowds, high prices, and a minimum four-hour time commitment. The long line at Space Mountain gives two people who know each other time to chat, but it can be an awkward hour of silence for strangers who don't get along. If you've decided you don't like it for the third trip, that's a shame: there are eight more to go.
“You're stuck with them for hours. There's a lot of pressure and investment that goes into a first date,” said Amie Leadingham, a Los Angeles-based dating coach who grew up going to Disneyland.
Kayla Anderson, who worked on Disneyland over five years, he learned this the hard way several times while working there. She ended up at Disneyland on a first date with a man who tampered with ride signs, challenged employees, and took a sword from a child. On another occasion, her date was banned for explicit clothing.
“You're stuck with someone you don't know very well,” Anderson said, “and then you have to be alive and be in a bad mood in front of someone for the first time. They get hungry, they have to wait in a long line for food, and then the food costs 40 dollars. “I'm getting stressed just thinking about it.”
Those disadvantages can be advantages for those who have already made a connection, Leadingham said. Compatibility can become obvious when faced with what looks like a glove covered in pixie dust. “It shows planning, compromise and conflict management skills between two people,” Leadingham said. “Maybe someone is spontaneous and just takes any trip at any time, and then the other person plans the entire trip. “You can really start to introduce personalities when it comes to Disneyland.”
A one-day adult ticket to Disneyland costs between $104 and $179, not including additional admission to Disney California Adventure park. But often the fine is just a down payment: Add $30 for parking, more for a meal for two, add a Mickey bar or photo during the trip, and the bills add up. That means you want to bring in someone who you know will make the price worth it.
San Diego resident Aileen Garcia had the best date of her life when her boyfriend of six months took her to Disneyland as a Christmas gift. In long lines, they got to know each other more and played phone games (García recommends the Heads Up app). Then there was the snack group (The pickles were a highlight.) Not only did they have fun, but they also learned how to communicate and handle difficult situations, like when her boyfriend vomited on a swaying gondola. Unlike Wong's experience with the fireworks, Garcia noted it as her favorite moment to share with her boyfriend.
“I remember it started snowing and music was playing, and he was just telling me how much he loves me and how much fun he had,” García recalled. “It sounds really cheesy, but it was a magical moment for me.”
Disneyland is such a romantic place that it has its own dating sites. Networks like Meet Upon Main and MouseMingle cater to Disney fans looking for romantic connections, while Facebook groups connect passholders. Meet Upon Main also has similar platonic options to Bumble BFF.
Robby Scharfeld, who grew up going to Disneyland, officially launched his pandemic project. Meet in main, last year. It connects Disney fans across the country, from park visitors to Marvel obsessives to cruise line devotees. For those who live near a Disney resort, it's an optimal way to find a partner theme park.
Before meeting at Disneyland, Scharfeld recommends video chatting to get to know each other. “That's another level of convenience that today's technology can provide. “These generations are more comfortable seeing each other on screens and then when they meet in person, it’s not as awkward,” he said. “There's no real pause in the conversation because they know each other so well from dating sites.”
Although a date at Disneyland is more expensive than, say, dinner and a movie, it's a price people are willing to pay. Leadingham suspects it's the escapism of it all.
“It's a magical place, so it brings romance,” he said. “And I think it's a really fun place to connect.”
