OKLAHOMA CITY — Duke coach Marissa Young continued to look around the Blue Devils' dugout. But she couldn't see her husband, James Lamar, anywhere in the stands.
The Blue Devils softball team was playing the biggest game in the program's short history against Stanford in the 2023 Super Regionals. Lamar, a travel softball coach who coached his two daughters and several of Duke's players at the school high school, he wouldn't have missed it. And yet, he wasn't there.
Young then felt that something was wrong. But he also had a game to coach, not knowing how he was about to change his life.
A year later, on Thursday, on the opening day of the Women's College World Series, Young roamed the stadium again, looking for Lamar. This time, she finally found him in the third inning, sitting in a wheelchair in the first-base side concourse.
“Softball has been our life since we met,” Young told ESPN on Friday morning. “He's a big reason why I'm here as a coach. He's been our biggest fan and he's very interested. I'm glad he was able to enjoy and experience this with us… It's really special.”
Young, a former star pitcher at Michigan, is now a rising star as a coach. Duke hired her in 2015 to launch its softball program. The Blue Devils began playing games in 2018. Three years later, she surprisingly had them in the postseason.
This year, Young guided Duke to its first appearance in the WCWS, becoming the first Black head coach to come to Oklahoma City.
And she did it while caring for her four children and caring for her husband, who has been fighting for his life and then his health since last year's super regional.
“One of the strongest women I've ever met,” said Duke ace Cassidy Curd, who played for Lamar in high school. “She comes to the field with a smile on her face, she gives us all her attention…she's super inspiring.”
Before Duke's second super regional game last year, Lamar began to feel unwell, thinking he was suffering from pneumonia again after an earlier fight with her. The couple's oldest son, Braylon, took him to the emergency room. But Lamar didn't want to distract Young or the Blue Devils, so he didn't tell the rest of the family that he was in the hospital until after the game.
After Stanford eliminated the Blue Devils, Young was told the news and was rushed to the hospital. It turned out that Lamar had suffered a heart attack that caused him many other health problems. He was put on life support and underwent too many surgeries to count. Ultimately, he received heart and kidney transplants. He remained in the hospital for months. Young spent the fall away from the team so she could be at Lamar's side before returning in time for the season.
“We leaned on our faith,” said Young, who listened to gospel music to keep his hopes up and walked 30 minutes around campus to stay sane. “Obviously being at Duke with such an incredible medical team was part of that and just leaning on our family. My parents were fantastic, they really took care of our kids so I could be at the hospital 24 hours a day to help take care of them.” “. James. But it was really, really difficult. [It] It's still difficult.”
Young missed her players and she missed her training. But Young is tough, as her players pointed out. Oklahoma coach Patty Gasso, whose Sooners defeated Duke in Game 1 of the 2024 WCWS, also saw that toughness when she recruited Young out of California 25 years ago.
“I knew she was going to be really special because she was a true competitor,” Gasso said of Young, who was the 2003 Big Ten Player of the Year. “But to me, it's more than softball. She's just a great example of a woman who “He fights for his family, he fights for his team. So I respect what he's done through all of that to keep his team here. I really hope they keep going.” “.
The Blue Devils have already come this far. The same can be said for Young and Lamar. The two met shortly after college. He was about to go play professional softball in Texas. His work organized a farewell party for him. Lamar was there and the two immediately hit it off.
Young had plans to go to law school and become a lawyer. But Lamar convinced her to get into coaching. When her daughters were old enough to play softball, she returned the favor and told him to stop coaching soccer so he could coach her softball teams. Lamar eventually became coach of the Lady Dukes, a travel under-18 softball team. Her oldest daughter, Layla, now a high school senior, is headed to Florida to play softball; her other daughter, Jolyna, a high school student, is committed to UCLA; both the Bruins and Gators are also in this WCWS. Her oldest son, Braylon, is a backup linebacker in Miami; Her other son, Kayden, is in eighth grade.
After deciding with his assistant coaches which pitcher would pitch in Friday night's elimination game against Alabama, Young went to pick up Lamar and take him to the hotel lobby.
Lamar had not seen the Blue Devils play in person this season until the ACC tournament earlier this month. This week he got on a plane for the first time in more than a year, even though he is still undergoing treatment to restore his circulation. This summer, he is scheduled to undergo bilateral heel reconstruction, an extremely rare procedure.
When asked what being in Oklahoma City meant to his wife, after she had been there for him all last year, he couldn't hold back his emotions.
“That game meant more than a game to me and her,” he said, wiping tears from his face with Young sitting to his right. “She was there for me every step of the way. She got me out of bed. She rolled me around in the showers… there are no words for what that game meant to me. Seeing some of these kids that I coached, it was like if everything in life came full circle. I simply couldn't have written a better script for a movie.”
The Blue Devils will try to stick to their own movie script on Friday night. Lamar will be there again. Young man looking in his direction. The two of them living the moment together again.
“Win or lose, we have already won,” he said. “I don't care at all what the result is. My family has won.”
