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2023 College Football 10-Year Review


  • Ryan McGee, ESPN senior writerJanuary 13, 2024, 06:40 am ET

    Near

    • Senior Writer for ESPN The Magazine and ESPN.com
    • Two-time Sports Emmy winner
    • 2010, 2014 NMPA Writer of the Year

The last 10 inspiring thoughts of the week:

Time flies, messy like the mud on your truck tires.
Now I miss your smile, listen to me
We could just walk
And the road not taken looks great now
And it always takes you and my hometown…

We could even call it
Although I'm leaving
And I'll be yours for the weekend
'Tis the damn season

— “'This is the damn season”, from Travis Kelce's girlfriend.

Here at Bottom 10 headquarters, located in an abandoned Houston warehouse filled with unsold Bluebonnet Bowl merchandise, we've spent the days since the end of the regular season and the start of the bowl season contemplating, well, the season itself.

Last weekend we enjoyed Army-Navy and the various lower-level NCAA playoff games, but, like we did during the previous Championship Week, we were like my dog ​​after he buried all his toy bones in the yard and then immediately forgot where he was. I hid them. Without our beloved bottom 10 teams in the field, we were a featherless dart. Lost.

To counteract those empty mid-December feelings and, well, yeah, to give myself an excuse to say “sorry, I have to check my phone” at the neighborhood Christmas party to avoid talking to that guy in my cul-de-sac. sac who went to Florida State: We've sourced a list of the top 10 moments and memories from the 2023 college football season. We hope you enjoy it. And we hope Connor Stalions hasn't ruined it for you already, because we're pretty sure we saw a guy in a Central Michigan Chippewas hat and binoculars outside our window earlier.

With apologies to Taylor Swift, 1987 Astro-Bluebonnet Bowl hero Brett Stafford, and Steve Harvey, here are the final 10 moments and other goodies for 2023.

The last 10 entries of the year, presented by Doors & More: Oklahoma, week 13

As soon as the Sooners took the field for their season finale and all-time Big 12 finale against TCU, they accidentally recreated the scene in “The Replacements” where Keanu Reeves & Co. fell out of the tunnel, even though OU replaced the cable trap. with the head of a teammate.

The 10 final press conferences of the year, brought to you by MCI Calling Cards: James Franklin on deep throwing

In the days leading up to Penn State's pseudo-bye week against bottom-10 stalwart UMess, Nittany Lions coach James Franklin was asked a question about making shots on the field. Franklin reacted as if Jigsaw had just told him that he would have to eat his own arm to escape the room. He ended his “no”-filled answer by adding, “I hope we can eliminate this so it doesn't get out into the universe.” In related news, Penn State ranked 73rd in the nation in yards per play.

Top 10 Injuries of the Year, brought to you by Goody's Back & Body Pain Powders: Western Kentucky's Bryson Washington

The WKU Hilltoppers were in the middle of a see-saw battle with Louisiana Tech when sixth-year linebacker Bryson Washington was involved in a big tackle for a loss. But during his celebration of the play, his right leg bent like my putter after missing a 2-footer on the local municipal course and then being slammed onto the green like Thor's hammer. The bad news? Washington had to be helped off the field and his sprained leg took over college football social media timelines. The good news? He later returned, recording seven tackles and an interception, and winning Conference USA Defensive Player of the Week.

The Year's Top 10 Camps, Presented by NBC's “The Blacklist,” Starring James Spader: SUNY Morrisville

There were already college football fields colored blue, gray, teal, and even red and purple. But NCAA Division III competitors SUNY Morrisville launched a new playing surface this season that is solid black. That would never work in the Deep South, where in September that surface would become a big frying pan, but near Syracuse, the Mustangs have no such worries. Plus, you lose a lot of weight.

The Top 10 Stunts of the Year, Presented by Cirque du Soleil's Bazaar: Garrett Shrader, Syracuse

The best I can tell is that former St. Louis Cardinals shortstop Ozzie Smith never did his trademark backflip at the old Yankee Stadium, but on Nov. 11, Syracuse quarterback Garrett Shrader did one at the new Yankee Stadium while the Orange hosted Pitt. He had opened up to attempt a running back pass and apparently believed the impromptu gymnastics routine would provide the kind of distraction the trick play would need to work. But not only did the cornerback assigned to defend Shrader not see the flip, but the play was run on the opposite side of the field, a double pass that ended flat when running back LeQuint Allen caught a lateral and threw a very deep but very incomplete. .

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0:19

Syracuse QB does backflips during team trick play

Syracuse runs a trick play and quarterback Garrett Shrader does a backflip as a distraction.

Top 10 Cheats of the Year, brought to you by Sansabelt Slacks: Iowa Cheer

Hey, at least Shrader kept his pants on…

The last 10 “blind sides” of the year, presented by the Memphis Bar Institute by billable hours: State of New Mexico v. Hugh Freeze

When Auburn and first-year coach Hugh Freeze were stunned on the Plains by a 31-10 loss to New Mexico State, the bottom 10 legends turned Conference USA contenders, it was just the second time in recent memory that a team entered a game. as a loser by more than 21 points but won by 21 points or more. Last time it happened? A year ago, when those same Aggies did the same thing at Liberty, which was coached by… Hugh Freeze.

The Top 10 Uniforms of the Year, Presented by Pearl Jam's “Black”: Florida Gators, Week 10

The Gators still hold the distinction of having earned our title of the 10 worst uniforms of all time a few years ago, via their duds that were supposed to look like real alligator skin but ended up looking like tree bark. There weren't all that distracting details on their military salute uniforms against Arkansas, which were instead all black. Not orange. Not blue. Not even white. Black. At noon in central Florida. Those in the Swamp were having a hard time deciding how they felt about the appearance. But by the time the Hogs were up 14-0 after three minutes of play, Florida fans' minds had gone to a place as dark as the strings on the field.

The last 10 games of the year, presented by Timex: Georgia Tech at Miami, Week 6

As that tweeter, or X'er, whatever, had warned, black magic was very real in 2023. Just a month earlier, the Canes had seemingly eliminated Georgia Tech, up three points in the middle of Yellow Jacket territory as visitor. Tech had no timeouts left (or maybe it did; there was some confusion about that, too). That's when Miami opted to run the ball rather than take a knee and presumably end the game with half a minute left, iceing the win and successfully defending their No. 17 national ranking. But the Canes executed it. And he failed. And then Tech went 74 yards in four plays and 25 seconds. And then Miami lost. And then the nation lost it.

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Miami coach's mistake leads to epic Georgia Tech comeback

Miami's decision to run the ball leads to a crucial fumble, which Georgia Tech recovers and then completes the miraculous comeback.

The 10 last outings of the year, brought to you by your Uncle Lonnie and his Irish outing later this month after Christmas dinner: Oh possum, my possum

This crazy marsupial that was forced to leave Texas Tech's game with TCU in Week 10 will be all of us in a few weeks when the 2023 college football season comes to a close. And if you think it's cute, head to Lubbock, where this opossum has become a corporation of bugs, spawning t-shirts and posters wherever Red Raiders teams show their teeth.



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