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A bridesmaid has sparked anger over her decision to resign from her position.
In a recent Reddit post shared on the popular subreddit “Am I a moron?”, a woman explained that her friend had chosen her as a bridesmaid in a small, intimate wedding. She explained that there were no typical wedding aspects, such as physical invitations and a ceremony.
“Just the court and dinner (the bride herself says that, I'm not guessing),” the woman clarified in her Reddit post.
She was recently informed that she had received a job offer that required her to move out of town and was not satisfied with the way the girlfriend responded to this news.
“When I told my friend this, all she said was, ‘When are you leaving? Can you still come to my wedding?’ No congratulations, no ‘I’m happy for you,’ nothing,” the Reddit post continued. “I should add that two weeks ago I spoke to her about where we would have dinner for her wedding and she said she didn’t have anything planned yet, let alone booked.”
The bridesmaid noted that she would have waited for the bride's response if the wedding details had been worked out. “But in that context, I have decided that if all she cares about is herself and her wedding, and she can't be happy for me, I will not be going to the wedding,” she concluded her post.
After posting, many people took to the comments to tell the woman that she should have been more understanding of the bride's potential stress about the upcoming wedding.
“While your friend’s reaction may have seemed dismissive, she may have been caught up in the stress of wedding planning and hadn’t fully processed the big news. Weddings, even small ones, can be overwhelming and she likely values your presence on such an important day,” one comment began.
“Instead of immediately deciding not to attend, you should have communicated how you felt about her response. Friendship is a two-way street and it’s important to express your feelings instead of making assumptions. Cancelling your role as bridesmaid over one comment seems self-centered and could damage your friendship in the long run. Talking it out would have been a better strategy.”
Another commenter agreed, writing: “Yes, it’s rude of her not to congratulate you on your work, but in your post you are denigrating her wedding by putting it in quotes. You were clearly going to play an important role on the day and you must be close friends if you are the maid of honour and one of the 10 guests.”
Other commentators pointed out how much the poster “disparaged” the wedding simply because it was more of an elopement than a formal church ceremony.
“It’s clear you don’t care about her wedding. Everything you said makes it very clear that you don’t consider it a real wedding since she’s keeping it small and intimate,” one person wrote in the comments. “But it is a wedding and it’s hers. While she definitely should have congratulated you, it makes sense that she would be concerned that her friend, who she cares about enough to ask to be a maid of honor at her small wedding, would still be able to attend said wedding.”
