The thought of the holidays approaching and having to attend the company's New Year's Eve party without a date made me gasp. That's why I focused my attention on my dating app. Luckily, a super blue highlight from a tall, dark, handsome guy woke me up more than my latte.
It was 80 miles from Los Angeles. Could that work? As I was scrolling through his shirtless photos and travel stories on my phone, a message appeared in my inbox. A brief “How are you today?” from him progressed to texts back and forth throughout the day that led to “Instead, text me on my cell phone.”
From good morning text messages to sharing a large number of images over several days, finally! — the offer came “Let's meet and greet.” She did all the right things: she picked me up at my house, opened the car door, stepped out onto the sidewalk, and held my hand. I knew what was expected of a gentleman and that gave me hope.
What seemed like an hour-long talk ended up being an extended 6 and a half hour date that took us well into closing time at Angel City Brewery.
He paid the bill, took my hand to lift me from the stool, and extended his hand to allow me to walk in front of him. Were you checking the merchandise? I felt warmth on my waist as he put his arm around me and walked beside me to the car. The ride home was too short and, as I suspected, he walked me to my front door.
He smiled at me, tucked my hair behind my ear and gave me a soft kiss on the lips. That sweet, perfect kiss made my heart race and my stomach flutter. I told him to be safe on the long walk back to Camp Pendleton and said goodbye. Before I could reach the door to my room, I heard my phone ring. It was him: “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen and I can't wait to see you again.”
It was music to my ears.
After years of searching, could it be possible that I had finally found my soulmate?
After six months of going on weekend getaways and sending surprise flowers to the company, I felt like I was on top of the world.
There was never an awkward moment of silence and we shared every dream, fear and personal thought. I met all of his friends, even those closest to his heart, from his first unit in Iraq. He met my son and daughter and from that moment on, my daughter became his daughter. He taught her to swim, play the guitar and do karaoke. The good morning messages also included “Say hello to the girl.” Music for my ears.
I will never forget our evening on Del Mar beach; Our usual sunset run on the sand was epic. She stopped me and said, “You are the baddest single mother and the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you like I've never loved anyone. And someday I will marry you, as long as you say yes.”
He wasn't the type to kneel, but I didn't care. He was everything he had ever dreamed of: my best friend, lover, fighter, giver. He was responsible, hard-working, funny and kind. He didn't need anyone else. For me he was the most attractive man in the world. We talked about where we would live after he retired from the military, our travel plans, and the type of house we would buy together. Nothing would come between us.
For our sixth anniversary, I planned a romantic getaway to the beach. Suitcases were packed and wine and a charcuterie board set the mood.
I had already drunk three glasses and he had barely drank his. He was reticent and serious, which was unlike him. He wanted to improve his mood, so I asked him to dance. As we danced around the hotel suite, I stopped in the middle of the song and directed him toward the bar, which I had filled with tickets to Hawaii for the following summer.
His face went from serious to worried as he began to walk around the room. She had her fists clenched. She didn't know what was happening.
He grabbed my hand and led me to the foot of the bed. There was a long pause and I could feel my heart racing. She began, “I didn't know how I would tell you tonight, but here it goes. You deserve the truth. My ex-girlfriend dropped the bomb that she believes her newborn baby is mine. I took a DNA test and he is mine.
“I need to do the right thing and marry her,” he said. “I have a duty to my country as an honorable man. It's what the Marine Corps has taught me, and I also have a duty to this little man who needs a full-time father, not a seasonal military father. I have to do the right thing.”
I felt like blood was rushing from my stomach to my face. Once again, I felt like I was floating in the air. I couldn't see anything but the tears in her eyes and I felt her palms sweating on the back of my hand.
At some point I could make out images in the elaborate wallpaper of the hotel room. My stomach filled with pain, my chest felt heavy, and my eyes didn't blink until warm tears filled my neck. His last words to me were: “I'll let you stay in the room and give you some space. “That's the least I can do.” When he closed the door behind him, I felt like my soul was escaping my body. I never saw him again.
The author is a paralegal in Los Angeles and works on everything from writing to love essays. She is on Instagram: @karen_kss05
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