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Weddings are notoriously expensive, so it's not always possible for the bride and groom to cover all the expenses.
In a recent Reddit post shared on the popular subreddit “Am I the Asshole?”, a bride revealed why she needed to replace her maid of honor. The post began by explaining that all of her bridesmaids had jobs, were in their 20s and 30s, and didn’t have kids.
The bridesmaids group had gone out of town shopping for dresses while the bride paid for two hotel rooms. “For the dresses, my only requirement was that they had to be a specific color of blue and not satin. We spent the entire afternoon trying on dresses and everyone found one they liked, including my maid of honor.” [maid of honor]”the bride's Reddit post read. “I was told she chose a $350 dress when most of my other bridesmaids had dresses in the $100-$150 range.”
However, her maid of honor later complained that she had paid for the dress from one of the other bridesmaids. She told the maid of honor that if the bride had specific requirements for the dress, then she should pay for the dresses. The maid of honor also claimed that her own bridesmaids did not pay for their dresses during her wedding.
“My maid of honor told her that I was being quite reasonable with my request and that she could get any dress she wanted within her budget. The health minister disagreed and the maid of honor downplayed it, but told me about it later,” the post continues.
A month later, the maid of honor called her and asked her to pay for the dress. The bride refused because she couldn’t afford it and told her that if she paid for it, she would have to pay for all of her bridesmaids’ dresses. “She said that she is the maid of honor and that everyone would understand that it was a privilege that she had,” the bride explained.
“I disagreed and our argument got a little heated. I eventually told him that if I couldn’t get the dress, I wouldn’t be able to attend the wedding and that I wasn’t going to budge on that point. He hung up on me,” she wrote.
The bridesmaid's mother even got involved in the incident when she told the bride she was “being rude” for not buying the dress, claiming she “didn't understand what it's like to not have money for things.”
Since the argument, the woman has given another bridesmaid the maid of honor spot, though she still gave her former maid of honor an invitation to the wedding. “Some family members are telling me I should have paid for the dress,” she wrote. “I know the former maid of honor is short on money, but I’ve known she was going to be in my wedding for almost two years, so I figured I would set aside money for it.”
After posting, people took to the comments section to defend their decision not to pay for the dress.
“It wouldn’t be fair to the other bridesmaids if you paid for her dress and not theirs. What’s most outrageous is the fact that all of your bridesmaids were given your discretion for dresses and she chose a $350 dress while the other bridesmaids chose dresses between $100-$150. Then she wants you to pay for the $350 dress!” one comment began.
“If she really wanted to be at your wedding, she would have saved up $100-$150 over a two-year period. Clearly, her desire was to get an expensive dress that she wouldn’t have to pay for. As for her mother’s comment, it sounds like you’re inviting her to be present on your big day, but not as a bridesmaid who isn’t willing to pay for her dress.”
Another commenter agreed, writing: “Sometimes brides pay for bridesmaids’ dresses. Sometimes they don’t. The bridesmaid knew better and chose a dress that was at least twice as expensive as everyone else’s, then complained that it was too expensive.”
